Drafting

Thanks, Brianne. Your sophisticated butt-lick of a note has gotten my full attention.



Here's the problem with being in love with the person whom you are engaged to marry: you tend to save the best of yourself for her:

• Opinionated guys: your best conversations.
  
  
• Businessmen: Your very best "I won't be home for dinner" phone calls.
  
  
• Politicians: Epic infidelity (...ha ha ha, go away)
  
  
• An artsy, Apple computer-loving, moderately left-wing, not shit, loquacious, comedy-loving guy (like me), the kind of guy who will spend five fricking minutes losing his mind trying to think of words for an arbitrary self-description before copping out in disgust: your best discourse, jokes, ideas, music, hopes, dreams, ambitions, etc.

Point taken, I hope. Put it on the back burner.

Molly is my soul mate. I don't mention her much online because I am a believer of personal privacy, especially in the unaccountable world of the Internet. But it's true, Molly is going to marry me, and she's awesome. You know how awesome she is? She got me to eat broccoli on a regular basis, something I haven't willingly done since the age of 3. She somehow got me to care about things that successful people take for granted, like first impressions and personal appearance.

I'd go so far as to say as she carried my ass through college. When I lost sight of my goals, she reminded me. When I lost momentum, she pushed me, and when I wouldn't budge, she kicked me in the privates, really hard. Without her, I'd probably have flunked out, moved back to South Bend to get some degree at IUSB, and live out my life in a bubble of video games, Internet crap, and aimless tom-foolery. I've become vital to her life, and she's returned the favor.

In high school and pre-Molly-era college, I always blogged and wrote web pages and made music and drawings for publication on the Internet. I felt like I was displaying these works for a specific audience, but I couldn't figure out who my intended audience was, almost like an imaginary friend.

Then Molly came into my life. Before we became serious, she read my entire old blog on Teen Open Diary (now defunct), all 200+ entries, in one sitting. She told me she really liked it. She also really liked the music I played and wrote, the videos I shot, and pretty much everything creative I did. I realized she was my audience that I needed all this time.

Recall what I said about saving the best of yourself. Now that I have my dream audience in real life, it's tough to remember to duplicate my best stuff for an interbutt blog. I save my best stuff for her.

Having said that, I'm still blogging. I've got a nice stash of drafts that I haven't finished.



Oh, wait, I'm getting a vision...


I'll tell you why, Brianne: they're not for you. They're not for my blog. They're for Molly. I will finish them when I feel like making something new to show to Molly. End of story, ginger kid.

~Jake

More drafts I thought of while writing this one:

(future post: people share too much info on the interbutt)
(future post: fast food wrecked my palette)
(future post: I do really dumb things)
(future post: Obscure Cristian organization offended by sketch containing partially obscured mammaries in revived Starbucks logo, considers boycott, coins "Slutbucks." / "Nude bathing" is next in the protest queue.)